Operation Fine Tune

The Wish List

Saturday night, me and my Crew invaded (by invitation, of course) my Bestie's home to help celebrate her daughter's graduation from veterinary school. It was a tight circle of friends and family, some of whom we only see once every few years. So the men, most of whom fall into the "Cool Cat" category, were free flowing with their obligatory greetings of "you're looking as lovely as ever," (to which I only half jokingly reply "well, thank God because I'm trying harder than ever!"), "you look younger every time I see you," and my personal favorite "you always have a Parisian actress on vacation kinda style." Now I must point out that I am neither French, nor a Thespian, but found great pleasure in imagining myself as Sophie Marceau sipping her morning coffee at the Hotel Du Cap overlooking the French Riviera. I was jolted back to reality by a tiny set of hands urging me to snap Barbie's torso back together.

I am no stranger to compliments, my Husbear, with his slowly deteriorating 1/2 century eyes reassures me that I "still look good." Noah, however, showers me with the ultimate praises ranging from "Ooooh, you have hair under your arms?" to "Mommy, your tummy is so soft... and mushy like play-doh" Now THAT's love!

So this all brings me to Sunday morning standing in front of the bathroom mirror, assessing....

My beauty regime has always been a little lack luster, I've forever admired the pretty collection of jars, bottles, brushes, and tubes that line the vanities of the "It" girls. My vanity adheres to a strict diet of La Prairie Skin Caviar, Cetaphil body cream and Clinique Black Honey lipsrick. 

Is it time to step it up a notch and join the Cool Girl's Club? If so, do I start from the top of my thinning, two-toned, head of hair on down or do I slowly make my way up beginning with my pedicure starved feet. The toes look dire so I decide to start there. Every 18 inches or so I stop to analyze and take notes. By the time I reach my neck, I conclude that I've already spent one child's college tuition on "Operation Fine Tune," and stop before I get to my face so that we can actually pay our morgage every month.

Feeling slightly defeated, I'm pulled out of my pity party by the Barbie Terminator, who would like to know if I would like "a smooth beautiful complexion? Because you can't buy Pro Active in the stores, this incredible deal is only available for a limited time through this special tv offer." 

Scary...I'm tempted to cancel our cable.

I  force a smile and say, "Thanks Camilla, I think I'm good for now. " She shrugs and wanders off singing,  "Let it go, Let it go...."

Words of wisdom by a 5 year old. Let it go, indeed.