It's over. Yes, I'm totally convinced. Winter is over - in June. I'm going to tackle the coat closet and put away big fat Michelin Man puffers, fuzzy shearlings and heavy 3/4 wool coats until next season (the 90 day countdown begins).
As I start to pull out my "summer wardrobe," I'm feeling a void - especially in the skirt department. The skirt, for the last several years, has been the red-headed step-sister to the dress. Each time I'd reach for her in my closet, I'd hear my LBDs tauntingly whisper, "you know you love me more...she's so fussy and high maintenance. She needs constant adjusting and now you need to spend another 5 minutes looking for her sibling who will undoubtedly need to be re(half) tucked for the duration of the day. Really? Ain't nobody got time for that."
"But I miss her, " I'd bemoan. Eventually, I'd succumb to the pressure and throw on one of my dozen or so LBDs and be out the door in 2 minutes flat - easy, breezy, lemon squeezy. Such has been the scenario for the past 3 years.
This year, however, I'm on a mission. Now that the weather has appeared to have stabilized at Californian friendly temperatures (for you East Coasters, that means over 74 degrees), I'm jonesing for skirts. Perhaps, I've subconsciously developed skirt envy after folding and hanging fluffy mounds of tulle and gauzy liberty printed versions into Camilla's wardrobe. She, unlike her fickle mother, has declared her undying allegiance to the skirt for the better part of her entire life (5 whole years).
Now being a transplanted Southern Cal kinda gal, 70 degrees still leaves me wanting a little coverage to warm up my perpetually thin blood so I think I've come up with the perfect compromise of form, function and style. The SKRESS!
Skress - noun. A two piece ensemble consisting of a dress and pullover sweater (or top) that makes the dress appear to be a skirt.
Alright, I'm committed. Not only do I get a little extra warmth from the 2 layers, which is a blessing when indoor air conditioned temperatures usually hover around 71 degrees, but I get to recycle all the previously loved dresses that have been relegated to the cavernous recesses of my closet. I'm feeling very good about the recycling part, as our summer vacation is fast approaching and my name is suddenly going to go from Mrs. Mimi James to the initials ATM. My Husbear firmly believes that Disney owes parents 1 free admission to Disneyland for each child (at least once in their lives) as a thank you for being suckered into buying Lightning McQueen toothpaste, Frozen bedroom sets and Little Mermaid tricycles (with 3 kids, this list, should I choose to continue, would be longer than Atlas Shrugged so I will spare your battery life by stopping at 3 examples).
Despite being financially indebted to Disney, I decide I need a new skress outfit. Please refer to exhibit A.
 |
| Exhibit A Theory top and dress |
I asked 4 girlfriends, whose opinions I value for various reasons (coolness, intelligence, wit, and the ability to cook a meal and feed 4 hungry mouths while wearing a couture ballgown), their critique of the skress and why it works or doesn't work for them.
Angela remarked that I looked as though I'd recently escaped from a mental institution - she was not far off as I had just come to work straight from home. When I told her it was my new most favorite outfit and that it was ok, we could agree to disagree, she told me it hurt her heart to disagree with me... gotta love that girl.
Amy told me it was the least sexy outfit she's ever seen. Fair enough, but there are days when I am in the least sexy mood I've ever been in and that I, in my utilitarian, no nonsense skress, was the personification of such a state of mind. Plus, Rihanna stole my other look at the CFDA's (Please do not get me started on this outfit. I have 4 words - The Emperor's New Clothes). Amy, eventually admitted that the skress had a certain je ne sais quoi. Score! Skress 1 Rihanna 14,554,410.
Both Christina R. and Christina Ballgown approved of the look - Christina 1 even bought the same outfit!
While the days of skress dressing may be limited, due to the fact that it will soon be hotter than a Texas whore house on nickel night, fear not my friends. Somewhere under that top or sweater is a pretty little dress, either new or recycled, that some may even deem sexy.
No comments:
Post a Comment